I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
