Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(520): View more from Arizona

i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.

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(419): View more from Ohio

he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis

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(520): View more from Arizona

Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.

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(+61): View more from Australia

we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.

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(404): View more from Georgia

I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.

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(636): View more from Missouri

Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.

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(702): View more from Nevada

I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up

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