I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
