HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
