508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
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