i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
