He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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