What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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