i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I have already put on my inside pants.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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