so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
