I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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