he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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