no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
