had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize