at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
