This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
