I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
