plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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