yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
