the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Randomize