IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Randomize
