I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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