you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Randomize
