You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
