the new term for farting is butt boxing.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
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