He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
