yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
