Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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