It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
