I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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