Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
