o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
