Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
operation have a gay friend backfired
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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