I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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