You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I'm bleeding and have questions
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
