youre lurking in front of me
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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