Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
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