whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
