you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
