New invention idea: vibrating tampons
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
