There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Randomize
