Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
