we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize
