OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I have feelings that need drinking.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
