his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Randomize
