Nicole vs. Life
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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