this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
