I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
