I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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