Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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